Wondering how to overcome a crush? Want to dive deep into how to get over a school crush?
Few things are more troubling than an unrequited crush, and we have all been there. Maybe the person in question has started to see someone new or just isn’t interested in you that way. Either way, it’s not the best feeling.
Rest assured, you are not alone. It might ease your pain knowing that you’ll eventually get over your crush and probably bump into someone totally new and even better down the road, and you might also experience all of those fun things that go along with a new interest.
How To Get Over Your High School Crush?
For now, though, you’ll probably want to focus on the future, and get over a toxic crush that is possible through adapting to the following ways.
1. Talk it out to someone and let it go
Engage in a significant release session with your mom or best friend and put all your feelings on the table. Talk about what you saw and felt in this person, the pain you feel, all the details of your perfect imaginary encounter, etc. Get out all at once, then commit to letting go. Talking about specific things can help you better understand why you feel this way, and it also enables people who care about you to know what’s going on in your life and that you might need some extra support right now.
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2. Try not to obsess over
While speaking out loud is good for you, don’t let pain be the only thing you talk about. This is what psychologists call “overcoming,” which means you share the same sad feelings over and over again, indicating that you are still stuck feeling sad while reliving rejection.
Sometimes, it can be helpful to ask a friend or family member to help distract you when this happens. Support doesn’t just have to be talking about – there might be an activity you generally enjoy or a specific place you want to go, and it can be heartwarming to share that experience with someone who cares for you.
3. Don’t stalk their social media accounts
It’s infinitely harder to forget someone if you constantly check their social media accounts! Our best advice: stop following, stop following, stop following. Stop following or liking their Twitter, stop following their Instagram, stop following their Tumblr. You may need to see the object of your affection in class, but why make your life difficult?
Hiding the screen from the presence of your crush can do wonders. You can also use Facebook’s privacy settings which allow you to block someone’s updates from your feed! It’s giving up friendship without giving up, which is an excellent option if you’re worried about noticing a drop in the number of friends.
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Constantly checking an ex’s or crush’s social media keeps a relationship alive, and people often do when they’re not ready to face the end of that relationship. It’s okay to want to stay in touch with anyone who means the world to you, but it can also put you in a state of grief or loss. It takes a lot of courage and discipline, but most people find that they end up feeling better once they recognize that a relationship is over or that the desired relationship cannot go away. Earth.
4. Know your value and do what you love
When we recover from a crush, one thing our friends always remind us of is, “This is their loss, what is true! This person is not a specific person in the world. You, however, are the only you. Do something you remember – everything you are good at makes you feel fabulous and empowered when you do. If your next crush is genuinely worthy of you, they’ll be drawn to all of your talents and encourage you to give your best. (After all, a significant other is basically a different type of best friend forever.)
Bonus: Being busy with all the hobbies you love to do is a great way not to have time to dwell on a love. Almost lost.
5. Learn All You Can
Looking back, it’s always 20/20. Now that you’ve come back to feeling yourself think about the qualities of your old crush that you would like to find another. What didn’t you want about this person? You certainly don’t need to dive into a new romantic situation, but it helps to understand what you’re in and what you’re not – the next time you find yourself having feelings.
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6. Know that it is temporary and that you are not alone
Know that feelings will not last forever, no matter how your heart hurts. You will continue. “Feelings, even very negative ones, are actually temporary. A time will be there when you want a specific thing intensely, and it just won’t work. It is usual for it to take a long time to recover. But learning that feelings can go and go, even when it seems like you will feel sad forever – is anything you can remember the next time you’re feeling down.
Also, it can help to remember that you are not alone. We have literally all been there. You are not the one who is the first or the last person to try to figure out how to overcome a crush.
7. Take it all in your journal
Journaling has been shown to reduce stress, clear your mind, and help you overcome negative thoughts. Like, how? Well, in the first place, it allows you to take a moment and just focus on yourself and be present in the moment. With this focus comes clarity, and you can get some respite from your emotions and thoughts. The act of journaling in itself also heals – if you want, you can throw away the paper after you’ve written all your feelings down (we understand: sometimes you don’t want to keep track of your innermost thoughts).
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8. Meet New People
When you feel ready, consider meeting and dating new people. There is no pressure to start dating, of course, but also showing yourself off and being open to new possibilities can do wonders in healing your heart and giving you hope that you can develop new ones—feelings for someone else (although right now may not sound like it).